Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

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Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby lyndsey » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:21 pm

Hi everyone

I would appreciate your thoughts. I work in different places and have been very upfront about my diagnosis since finding out I have TMAU I tell people to go out of the office if it smells bad. Yesterday while in work a few staff came in when I was having a cup of tea and stated yuck do you smell fish in here its stinking they repeated this a few times laughing and stated I sprayed loads of perfume on this morning. Another lovely staff member said to me don't you have a call to make which I did but I think she was trying to warn me to get out of the room. I went back to the office and opened the Windows and thought I want to know when I smell as keeping a food dairy but I am no longer going to tolerate people taunting or trying to embarrass me.

Later a senior member of staff that was involved in the fish comments came to the office and stated its freezing in here which I stated I opened them because you said about a smell earlier she stated oh aye that smelt like fish laughed and then went.

Later on when giving a handover a member of staff commented about smelling the smell of a resident in the office I stated it may be me sure I've been diagnosed with tmau she stated I wouldn't have said that if I thought it was you. The senior member of staff stated I think you need a tablet as your paranoid you having us freezing opening all the Windows thinking you smell I advised I do smell I have been diagnosed with tmau. Am I going mad or were they trying to make me feel paranoid because I said something back to them and they are too scared of me complaining. Please let me know what you think as I am sure you may have suffered similar experiences.

Lindsey xxx
lyndsey
 
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Re: Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby Lisa » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:39 pm

Hey L,

You are NOT going mad, I reassure you.
If you have told your colleagues of your condition, and they were the ones making the comments, it could be they had completely forgotten, then bit their lips when they left the room, OR, they couldn't believe that a smell like fish can omit from a person? Just my take on it.
Here's what I would do, open a window if it makes you feel better, if a fish comment is made again say you have tuna/ salmon for your lunch, maybe they can smell that, or, just say I can't smell anything, it really does depend on how strong you are feeling that day, another solution would be, (if you're feeling brave enough), is too say, look, I have explained to you about my condition, it is a very cruel, embarrassing disorder to cope with, so I would appreciate some careful words or tact when you notice an odour please. Then smile.
Failing that I have a gun you could borrow? :lol:

Chin up Lyndsey, we are all with you in spirit.
L. X
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Re: Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby Lisa » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:47 pm

Just a after thought, I presume you were on your break?
Could you listen to some music, (calming, soothing, ACDC), on your iPod/ phone thru headphones?
That way you won't hear the comments while you are having a rest.

:D
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Re: Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby idealist » Fri Oct 17, 2014 2:06 pm

You know Lyndsey there was a time when I wished my odour was not omitting from my feet. I thought, I wished, believed, it would be easier if the smell would come from my breath. Mouth odour is not immediately detected and I could live a somewhat normal life. I went to see a healer and she somehow removed the odour from the feet/ skin but it is now only noticeable when I open my mouth. This is not a better alternative as I once thought. Yes, I can now sit on a bus/tube/airplane/ go to the pub/work/uni without having any strange/evil looks but once I open my mouth it is just as bad as before.

I was with someone today and she knows about my problem. I have known her for years on a professional bases. She knows I always chew gum, that I always look away when talking (so she does not get the full force of the odour). When I saw her today she did the gum/mint trick. She claimed this guy left it. I would have believed this, but the guy she claimed left the mints was walking out of her office as I was walking in, and when he left he was still waiting outside.

She could have opened the door, handed it to him, but no we had to go through the charades of 'do you want one he left them' routine. She was so eager for me to eat the mints, and said three times he left it. I gave her a blank stare and said I am already eating gum as I always do when I see you. She said nothing and that was that until she told me she wants to become a writer, writing stories about people who do not have a voice :roll: And she actually meant it (oh the irony) :roll:

I am sorry to say this but I think Lisa is right :cry:

They probably did not expect the smell they smelt to be coming from you. As I said this woman knows I always chew gum, know I have an odour problem so why buy me mints and do this big act. It is so ridiculous. I am not panicking, crying or even upset it is what it is- My life will go on and so will yours.

Sorry to sound so matter of fact but the people at your work place may need more time to adjust to the smell. I hope you prevail and get a respite sometime soon xx
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Re: Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby Lisa » Fri Oct 17, 2014 3:41 pm

Idealist,

Not at all wishing to undermine "Mintgate", but that situation would of made me laugh, purely for the need to repeat the " he left it behind" scenario, why do it, do they think when we developed this disorder we lost a few brain cells?
I think it's just the audacity/ stupidness of it all, I'm glad you weren't upset by it, we, sometimes, develop a thicker skin as a coping mechanism, sort of just kicks in, and you are right, we do have to learn to live with this, but sometimes, like everyone, we are allowed a bad day, and a comment that would normally be shrugged off cuts a little too deep.
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Re: Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby lyndsey » Sat Oct 18, 2014 4:03 pm

Hi Lisa and Idealist

Thanks for your replies and support and normally I can cope with comments but I thought being upfront and raising awareness of this condition would make people be more tactful but then that says more about them as a human being than it does me. I understand people may struggle to work with me but that doesn't give them the right to bully and embarrass me.

Thanks I love the support on here and Lisa I am with you all in spirit on difficult days too. You lifted my spirit and its time to be positive again.

Thanks

Lindsey xxx
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Re: Am I going mad please tell me your thoughts

Postby beautifulsoul39 » Sat Oct 18, 2014 9:36 pm

Hi all ,no your not going crazy ive been in similar situation in allways upfront but people look at you as if thinking but your so well dressed ,make up on hair nice they cant imagine its coming from you ,some people have an idea if you smell youd look different,as for the gum omg i chewed it for so long i literally didn't speak without a piece in my mouth but ditch it trust me your breath will smell 100% worse one it has soya in and two tmau is technically gas when you are chewing 24 7 your stomach thinks its going to get food so gases etc are released ,i now eat sugar free mints which are not great either but a start ,clove oil is good for emergency,think about this worse case scenario if you were told you had to pack survival food etc as the world was having disaster would you care if you smelt or what people thought or if you were eating tmau diet i wouldn't,life is far too short we are who we are ,big hugs
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