Why we should be happy in our lifes

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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby lyndsey » Sun Nov 14, 2010 10:09 am

Hi Bluey

How did you get on with medical? I know what you mean bout roller coaster ride I was on one of those for 21 years of my life lol then I decided enough is enough Im too old for life on a rollercoaster my ex was very charming when he was being good but when he was being bad he was very very bad lol. To be honest I dont know how I stuck it when I look back now, but I consider myself lucky because I got three beautiful children out of it. At the start I felt so stupid for putting up with and hated him for what he had done to my children and me, but now I am friends with him I have forgiven him because I think he made me grow stronger emotionally. I enjoy being on my own now as I have discovered who I really am and apart from this disorder I am happy with my life, just need to lighten up a bit more but Kittycat is helping me in that dept. I hope your on the mend from all recent events and take care of yourself Bluey.

Lyndsey x
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby BLUEY » Mon Nov 15, 2010 4:43 pm

Hi sk,
Thank you for your sympathys and support its very much appreciated.
So you have unfortunatley had to experience this too, im very sorry to hear this.
What is it with people? And there total lack of morals and loyality? Christ if they think so low of us then why bother with us in the first place. Think what it is sk is that when you show you have a genuine heart and soul chancers think we are a easy touch and they can use and abuse this in there favour and for there own selfish ways!! Thank god we did the same thing and said goodbye, as if we havent enough to contend with dealing with our disorder day in day out they want to put there emotional strain and mental mind games ontop we dont need it and at the end of the day what sort of a life would you live with a person like that in it, not a happy one! Even when the alarm bells ring it does take time to take action i think its because deep down we dont want this to be and also you find yourself saying am i right about what im thinking. But that old gut feeling never lies nor does our eyes and ears, its definatley helped me out in the past with making right decisions in bad situations. Like you say sk there are good people out there, thank you for saying someone who deserves someone like me, its very sweet of you. The problem i have is that i lack confidence as it is and when things like this happen it not only knocks your confidence but also my faith in meeting a genuine girl and having a geneuine realationship, also the fear of having to explain my disorder adds to the whole downer. Starting to feel better in the head now and from the accident so thank you sk. Omg you really have had a time of it, are you ok now? i really hope so and you be careful and take care of yourself.x

Bluey
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby BLUEY » Mon Nov 15, 2010 5:36 pm

Hi Lyndsey,
Medical went better thank what i thought thank you, turns out the pains in my chest are down to anxiety, from the accident and most proab that no good person who i was involved with. Doc says should hopefully all clear up by the end of the year, Omg you was put through that for 21yrs dont know how you did it, sounds like you had to dig deep and show a real strong hand but i would not expect any less from you lyns and i know you would stay strong for your children too (a fighter). Oh yes they can be very charming and tell you what you to hear all the time they are being sods behind our backs! Like you say though look what you got from it three children who you can love and cherish for the rest of your life, ( i would be happy just to have one! lol ) im glad it made you stronger and that you could take this away from the experience. your such a better person than me as i just wouldnt forgive someone who put me and my kids through this, id wanna wipe them off the planet. Thats only cause im sometimes to passionate about things and would want to make a stand, dont want to give you the wrong impression about myself though. I too enjoy my own company and like you have found out so much about myself and have grown as a person especially the understanding of others and my own mind, i know what im about and what i have gotta do in life now. Like you im pretty happy in life apart from the disorder but ive accepted it now and that ive just gotta get on with it no matter what. Dont worry about lightening up i can be abit serious myself, but you are fine the way you are, any way that kiity is a funny lady so she will definatley keep you laughing. Im getting there lyns with all thats gone on, but thank you so much for your care and concern its very much appreciated and thought off from you and everyone on this forum bless you all.xx Take care lyndsey.x

Bluey
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby SmellyKelly2 » Mon Nov 15, 2010 10:05 pm

Bluey
I totally relate to what you say and I know you will find someone who loves you for you no matter what.
I am really lucky to have a great boyfriend who does not care about my illness at all.
Unfortunately, sometimes we have to experience bad relationships before we find a good one and it is not easy.
I remember clearly how just how bad I felt at the time, but now it is a distant memory and I see it is a very lucky escape.
I only fell down a couple of stairs and hurt my nose on the door. So I am just a bit brused in places, but bounced back this week I am fine.
SKxx
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby BLUEY » Tue Nov 16, 2010 2:04 pm

Sk,
Glad you can relate to what ive said as its very comforting to be able to speak to you knowing what its like to have to go through this. I really do hope i find someone who will love me unconditionally would be all i could ask for and more, it would mean the world to me and i think be the making of me. I just cant see it happening though, not so much as with me as a person as i dont think im that bad but with this disorder i know how people react on my bad days and i just cant see who would want to have a realationship with me understand this and take it on, unfortunatley i just keep seeing the shallow side of people as of late and this does nothing for my faith in someone wanting to be with me. Still i must carrying on regardless as i cant and dont want everything else to slip away from me. You are right though sometimes we have to experience the bad to get to the good, i guess this helps us appreciate the good even more and going through things like this helps us grow as a person and understand ourselves and situations more ( not to be repeated springs to mind lol ) you do feel crap for a while but like you say with time it becomes a distant memory and a lucky escape, and the right person in your life can make that big difference and show you how nice things can and should be. You are very lucky to have such a caring and understanding boyfriend sk, you keep hold of him and lookafter him cause you dont know how lucky you are to have someone like this, what i wouldnt give to have this. Really glad you are ok after your fall you just be carfull in the future and lookafter yourself, thank you for your support and advice and just for taking the time out to listen, i really appreciate it from you and all of the others.
Bluey.xx
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby SmellyKelly2 » Fri Nov 19, 2010 12:07 pm

Yes, Bluey I am very luckly to have such a great boyfriend.
My main problems with this illness have been resigning from my job because of it, plus leaving my boyfriends house because of neighbours on one side that would not leave me alone (temp staying with mum and dad).
But in all of this he has stood by me, his property is up for sale at the moment.
So we hope to be living together again in the future.
It is difficult as I have clothes and a working office at mum and dads, my other stuff is still at my boyfriends house and I have a flat I rent out for income.
So life is never easy with this illness, never mind.
Have a good weekend.
SK
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby BLUEY » Mon Nov 22, 2010 8:56 pm

Hi Sk,

Hope you had a good weekend, the work situation is a very tricky one with this illness as we all need to work to earn money to survive, but the work place can be the worst place for discrimination and ridicule i feel your pain as have endevered this also. thats why i work for myself now as i dont have to spend alot of time with individuals in one place, did i read that right that your neighbours wouldnt leave you alone did you mean that as in they were digging you out? If so i have also had to suffer this from people in my street and in my area i could be just buying a paper and would be dug out! What with certain nasty individuals and chineese whispers i feel like ive become some what of a celebrity in my area, ive been challenged verbaly and physically over this disorder couldnt beleive it at the time as i knew it wasnt my fault. Mind you me being me and not the type to take it lieing down after a few straightners with people and certain individuals. they have left me alone, as they know i wont have any of it. Your fella sounds like a great guy and to stand by you all the way is just worth its weight in gold, i hope to find a lady of the same make up someday, hope you both get to live with each other soon and get everything sorted as you sound a nice couple and what you have been through sk you deserve every bit of happiness you can get. Thats good you are getting a income though from your flat, i moved back home quite a few years ago as i had a flat glad i did though as think i would of found this illness even worser if i had been living alone with no support. Still im hoping my work will generate enough money to move out again one day as im ready mentally to cope with it now, you are right though life is never easy with this illness, but u cant give up otherwise you will have nothing at the end of the day and we must try and get every bit of happiness what ever that might be.

Take care and best wishes

Bluey.
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby lyndsey » Wed Nov 24, 2010 8:11 am

Hi Bluey

Sorry for delayed reply have been really busy studying and havent be on for a while. Thank you for your message you always have a way of helping people. Bluey I dont think of me being strong more stupid, but believe everyting happens for a reason and have learned from my experience. I hope you do meet that special person and have a child or children because you have alot to offer as a partner and father because you have given a awful lot to this website and the people on it with sharing your thoughts and feelings and the sensitive person you are. Its people like you and on this website make the world a better place. I am glad that pains only anxiety though thats awful you must be going the rounds with all the stuff youve been through. I always remember my eldest daughter saying a few years ago about a saying she had found somewhere that it reminded her of me I be happy when I have a car I be happy when I have a house I be happy when I have a job dont wait for things to be happy be happy in the here and now. Thats the way I used to be and I am finding it a struggle some days to be back to that place please dont let your ex pull you down the way mine did. I keep saying when I find a cure to this disorder I will be happy again but I have to get out of this mindset and be the way I used and be happy now! Bluey sorry when talking to you I do seem to go on a bit! I hope you well on the mend and you take care of yourself.

Lyndsey x
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby lyndsey » Wed Nov 24, 2010 8:14 am

Hi SK

Thats awful about neigbours and so glad you having caring boyfriend. Was it to do with this disorder that thay gave you probs, if it was how cruel some people are. Must be coming up to your break away some hope you relax and have a great time you deserve it.

Lyndsey x
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Re: Why we should be happy in our lifes

Postby BLUEY » Sat Nov 27, 2010 4:12 pm

Hi Lyndsey,

Hope you are ok and well, no need to apologise for the delayed reply we all have things in life we got to attend to so i totally understand. You are welcome for my message anytime, im just glad what i say and think helps you and others it gives me alot of meaning to hear ive helped in someway. Come on lyndsey give yourself the credit you deserve you are far from stupid, but certainly a strong person to of gotten through all of that you should be proud you stood strong for yourself and your children. We have all put some sort of trust, faith, love and emotional involvement into someone who we have thought was special and genuine. I guess only time will tell if on there behalf this is true or just for show and they have other ideas on there agenda, in a ideal world everybody would be and say what they portray themselves as, but unfortunatley this is not the case so we have to dig deep and keep focused and strong if they do turn out to be not what they say they are and want to drag us down. Like you say though aslong as we can learn something from an experience then we in my eyes we are winning. What you wrote about me being a father and partner and the input ive put into the forum, you know im terrible for taking compliments, i just want to say to you sincerley thank you from the heart for what you said as i havent had anything as nice as that said to me in along while, but to be fair for you to say something like this should just show you how much of a sensative, caring and special person you are. Am slightly releived its only anxiety lynds but its been keeping me awake of a night and ive been finding it hard to get through the next day, hopefully this will pass with time. You must try and get back to being happy for the here and now and i hate the thought of you feeling down, try not put everything on a cure as we just dont know how long or if this will happen, so try focus on happy thoughts, memories and experiences things you have a passion for and things you want to happen in your future, dont let this disorder and people make you live a life of misery and a deppressed state, life is to short and certainly dont let it stop you living and being to your full potential as you are worth so much more that that! I wont let me ex pull me down im thinking of what she has done less and less now so im hoping it will be a distant memory soon. You dont go on lyndsey far from it i enjoy posting with you, anyway if you want to see going on just look at my posts lol. Im getting there with mending thank you, i hope you are well and that you are looking after yourself, take care and bestest of wishes to you.

Bluey x
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